Headline Humor – Tuesday, Feb. 22, 2011

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Trevor Bayne, 20, Wins at Daytona – http://ow.ly/41q4a. Bayne says race was “very realistic – almost like being in a video game!” Jennifer Aniston Debuts New Bob – http://ow.ly/41qj2. Wait – why would she do just one? Oops… misread the … Continue reading

Headline Humor – Tuesday, Feb. 8, 2011

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Today’s Headline Humor! Olbermann Moves to Al Gore’s “Current TV” Network – http://bit.ly/fXTPcc. Joinsillustrious line-up, such as: “Kill It, Cook It, Eat It” and its recent episode “Flamethrowers and Pigs Brains” http://bit.ly/h5CKCr. Job openings fall for second straight month (http://yhoo.it/ex0dxy); … Continue reading

Am I the only one who has trust issues with the mute button?

I will get into an aluminum tube fully aware it is going to be launched 33,000 feet in the air at 500 miles per hour.
I will pay bills online, transferring huge sums of cash (DOZENS of dollars) from my bank account to a business using my computer, never even seeing the money.
I will research a vacation location and make pricey reservations (again, DOZENS of dollars) site unseen, based solely on information I find on Internet.
But I cannot trust the mute button. When I’m on a phone call and someone in the room asks me a question, I hit the mute button and then whisper my answer. Then I freak out and double check that the mute button was on. Then I turn it off, then on, then off, then turn it on again and test it by barking at it in progressively louder shouts: “hey. Hey. Hey! HEY!”
And GOD KNOWS I will not… um… visit the facilities… when the only thing separating me from becoming a legend in the “Conference Call Faux Pas Hall of Fame” is that (obviously unreliable) mute button.
I mean, I’ll put my faith in technology and risk death, bankruptcy and a bad vacation, but I’m not crazy.

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Brain Surgery on a Hamster…

OK, you may have heard me in the past talk about how complicated the world has gotten, even when it comes to our pets. If you haven’t, check out this video:
httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FDI1ALEHB_c&feature=mfu_in_order&list=UL

Well, last night at a Super Bowl party I heard a story that tops even that. A friend’s family hamster… ok, to be fair, it is a pygmy hamster… has had brain surgery. TWICE. Total cost of two brain surgeries for a pygmy hamster: $120. Total cost for a brand new (and possibly identical) pygmy hamster: $30.

A couple points:

I’m not saying the family shouldn’t have had brain surgery performed on the hamster (…um, twice). I’m saying that the world has gotten infinitely more complicated than it used to be, and with that come additional stresses.
That said, the cost of the two brain surgeries added up to four times the cost of a new hamster. If the hamster were a car, he’d be declared “totaled” and be towed to a hamster junk yard.
And finally – $120 for two brain surgeries??? Forget Obamacare. How do we institute Hamstercare?.